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U P D A T E D W E E K L Y !
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![]() The Last Bastion of America's Liberal Media |
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31 May, 2004 Turd of the Week Iyad Allawi, You're Dick Cheney's new Iraqi handmaiden? Well, you've got great credentials, having given the world the 45 minute WMD soundbite see stories for details |
Blabbering
Bush Head Click
head for fresh random quote from |
Iraq War Cost
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Bush
Tries Stand-up Comedy Sporting his nearly non-metaphorical bicycle injuries, the battered Bush had a number of unfortunate tongue slips. It took him three different tries in various points in his speech to pronounce Abu Gru-hayeeb, with each failed attempt steeped in gutteral choking. Then he read the prepared text in which he stated, to the disbelieving ears of yours truly and my eternal life partner, "They (20,000 troops) can know that they will be heading home soon." Did he just say "beheading?" Bush laid forth what was to be his five point plan for creating a Democratic Iraq. For those who missed it, he's going to:
Bush's desperation strategy can be summed up as: You may have little confidence in my ability to unscrewup Iraq, but face it, I've messed things up so horribly that nobody can do any better. So re-elect me. At least with Iraq a seething cesspool of jihad, you know my Syrian invasion plans are on the back burner. For now. |
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Latest
Bush Administration Strategy: "Things
to Get Worse" I guess the Bush administration figures if you can't stop terror, you might as well predict it. Then if it doesn't happen, you take credit for it. If it does, you get to smugly stand in the smoldering ash pile and say "I told you so." Now that's leadership! |
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Hey!!!
At Least We're Not Beheaders" It is important to note that none of these witnesses have testified that we beheaded them! It is critical to keep it in perspective that beheading is arguably worse than rape, sexual assault, torture, humiliation, threatening, feces smearing, food served in toilets, forced renunciations of religion, sodomy, death by beating, dangling with shackles for hours, terrorizing, forced masturbation, forced sodomy, beating, burning by cigarettes, bending, folding, spindling and mutilation. Once again, America dominates the moral high ground! |
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| We Could Use a Little Bit
of Waffling Bush's incredible shrinking support base touts his steadfastery as the foundation to his (gulp) greatness. No matter that his rationale for waging war on the Iraqi people has been torn to shreds - he still refers to Iraq as the nexus of his war on terror. No matter that Iraqis are not welcoming us with open arms (unless you count firearms) - he still fights on like there's a light at the end of the quagmire. No matter that his team has revealed itself as duplicitous, corrupt and inept - he still stands behind them regardless. If this is what being resolute is like, then perhaps we could use something else. |
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